By the time I came home, an email was waiting for me: the
Symphony would be shuttered for the remainder of the season and their tour was
cancelled. A similar notice from the San Francisco Ballet arrived, too. Within a day or two, everyone
over 65 was advised to stay home. And so it began, this year of isolation and
tragedy.
None of us could have imagined that COVID would drag on for so long,
and yet it has. When the “new normal” began, I really had only one goal in mind,
and it wasn’t the one you’d think. Sure, I didn’t want to get COVID; like
everyone else in San Francisco, I wore a mask and hunkered down, limited myself
to lonely walks, lunch in the backyard, and the occasional visit to the grocery
store. Given my precautions and my privilege (good health, a stable home, food security, and a major medical center just up the street), it seemed unlikely
that I might die of the disease.
No, my big concern was how I would survive the
months ahead without falling into a major depression. Depression has engulfed me
at least four times in my life, and it can take years to climb back out. So it
was no small worry on my part. And yet, by letting go of any expectations, by
slowing down to a lazy retired woman’s pace, by just putting one foot before
another each day, I somehow made it. And though I was incredibly lonely, I
didn’t make it all on my own. It really did take a village.
So thank you Annie
and Jordan for our holidays together. Thank you Laura and Kathy for our weekly
walks. Thank you Sue for our art projects 6000 miles apart, and thank you Gail
for those closer by. Thank you Jeannette and Yang and Kevin for weekends
together, yet at a distance. Thank you Caroline and Ari and Cypress for short
visits to Pi. Thank you ZOOM for book clubs and conversations, and thank you
family and friends for keeping in touch. Thank you Pogo for trusting me with the
last few months of your life. Thank you Trader Joes for your efficient and
thoughtful service. Thank you supporters of trails and parks for allowing me to
dip into nature. Thank you puzzle makers at the New York Times and Wall Street
Journal and “Out of Left Field”, and thank you Mike for our thrice-weekly puzzle
discussions. Thank you Yann Martel for your inspirational book on reading and
the many authors I’ve explored this year. Thank you Point Reyes Yoga – Amanda
and Nick, Katie, Devi, Mary, Maile, and Maya – (and Wendy, too) for our daily practice. Thank you
Marin County Library and local librarians for delivering book upon book upon
book upon book. Thank you Netflix and Amazon for binge watching. Thank you Coursera for free online courses. Thank you PBS
Newshour for proffering hope that rational minds still inhabit our country.
Thank you UCSF for weekly Grand Rounds and vaccine delivery. Thank you first
responders of all sorts for fire control and medical assistance. Thank you New
York Times delivery person. Thank you John and Anna and Juana for looking after
my home in San Francisco. Thank you Spirit Rock and Zen Center for wisdom and
resources. Thank you Bovine Bakery for bear claws. Thank you San Francisco Bach
Choir for our weekly rehearsals and outreach. Thank you Julia Nielsen and
delightful Co-Vo sessions. Together, you have made it possible for me to survive
this year.
