It
has been nearly three months since I have written. Life’s troubles have made my posts infrequent
and stunted my progress in post-retirement self-discovery.
Still,
I am inching my way toward a new path. In December, I crafted a portfolio (using
my embryonic skills with InDesign) and applied to two Master of Architecture
programs. This came on the heels of a
course in digital tools for architecture and another on color theory. I came to my senses and restricted my
applications to schools in the Bay Area, reluctantly relaxing my reins to the
alma mater of my doctorate – MIT. At
this moment, I am simply too fragile to contemplate leaving behind the love of
my supportive friends and the familiarity of my rich environment.
Late
December through late January brought multiple rounds of family woes so
devastating that nothing else could be considered. But now I find myself enrolled again in two
classes – painting and architecture – trying to find some structure and meaning
for my life.
But
I have started to contemplate an alternate reality. What would it be like to
“just be”? To not have a path, to not
want a path? I can’t imagine this, but it would be a perfectly valid way to live a life. Could I do that? Should I do that?
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